Just like the child who tied a pork chop around his neck just to get the dog to play with him. There’s an innocence in that, a simple desire for connection, harmless and understandable.

But adulthood doesn’t give us the same grace. When we keep doing the equivalent changing ourselves, wearing what others like, shaping who we are just to attract attention or avoid loneliness: it stops being innocent. It becomes self destructive.

If you’re constantly attaching things to yourself just to be accepted, you’re not building real connection; you’re bargaining for it. And that bargain costs you your identity.

At some point, you have to choose differently. Do what you actually like. Be who you actually are. Some people will connect with that, and some won’t.

And if they don’t, you’ll still find your way. That’s the hard truth, but it’s also the only one that leads to something real.