The Quill of Samantha Grace Newcastle

affective empathy

  • Be Yourself….. Be real…..

    The trash man can have the the voices that tell you to toughen up, like feeling deeply is some kind of flaw, like tears are cracks instead of proof that something inside you is alive enough to break.Some of the strongest people I know cry every single day and still get up, still show up,… Read more

  • losses change the play book

    It was not just the betrayal. It was the audacity, the way someone who laughed with you, prayed with you, and knew your vulnerabilities still chose to hurt you as if you were disposable, or a project ; one of many rather than singularly valuableThat is what unsettles you. You begin replaying conversations, revisiting moments,… Read more

  • It is well with my soul 2

    The Apostle Paul teaches that when Christ was crucified, our old nature, our sinful self that once served sin, was also crucified with Him…. This truth reaches far beyond symbolic meaning; it speaks of a spiritual reality in which the believer’s former life is put to death through union with Christ.Before salvation, humanity lived under… Read more

  • not in my time,…. only His!

    “A little one shall become a thousand, and a small one a strong nation: I the LORD will hasten it in its time.” (Isaiah 60:22, Webster) How small the beginnings of God’s work often seem….A little one, a remnant, a seed hidden in the soil — all appear insignificant in human eyes. Yet from such… Read more

  • The healer dies!

    Tonight’s writing is part reflection, part elegy, and it says something many healers, empaths, and compassionate people experience but rarely express out loud: the exhaustion that comes from always being the giver, never the receiver. The healer was never meant to mend their own wounds, not the ones hidden in the heart, nor the quiet… Read more

  • it’s important, not blah blah blah!

    “And also upon the servants and upon the handmaids in those days will I pour out my spirit. And I will show wonders in the heavens and on the earth, blood, and fire, and pillars of smoke. The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before the great and terrible day… Read more

  • stage the urn

    The clock ticks,,each second a reminderof the charade,the performance that has grown too heavy,too worn Outside, the world around acts happy and joyful with family and home, while I stand numbed by the absurdityof my own existence,my polished and painted on grin cracking,revealing shadows beneath, as ,an urgent whisper: says “Stop,just stop.” It’s time to… Read more

  • Tired 321

    one day it was a beautiful moment, now it’s hated and I wait for death no reason to dream or wish or remember seeing someone on Sunday for 90 minutes doesn’t create truth or relationship real life stopped long ago Read more

  • Tired 7 6 5 4

    Life drags my body moves because it knows nothing else to do, yet breathing hurts like a fracture that never mends.The nights stretch, each one longer, the stars nothing but cold eyes watching What was once warmth is only dust now, slipping through my fingers as the mirror does not lie, a hollow face, pale… Read more

  • Why, How, Who

    I was asked today how do I write, how long have I written, and why. It’s a gift, a blessing, a curse, a tool to look deep within and view the core. Hyper Empathy, affective empathy, discernment,etc, they each play a role. Writing isn’t just an act for me; it’s a release, a necessity. Every… Read more

  • 2026 Vs yesteryear

    Human nature doesn’t change, but expressions do: Selfishness isn’t new, it’s baked into fallen humanity (Romans 3:23, Jeremiah 17:9). My parents and grandparents’ era had its own struggles, but community norms and fewer distractions made Christ like behavior more visible and reinforced. Now, with less external pressure to act generously, the default can lean to… Read more

  • anyone out there?

    I.In the hollow of your laughterthe walls trembled with a warmth that now shivers in the absence,each echo a splinter,each silence a weight I am unable to offsetII.You both were my compasses, the nurturing hands, the love, the life, the lighthouse in each storms. now with each breath only the sounds of  ghosts whispering of… Read more

  • It works

    “Then said he to me, These waters issue out towards the east country, and go down into the desert, and go into the sea: which being brought forth into the sea, the waters shall be healed.” (Ezekiel 47:8)The idea of the River is to bring life to the “desert,” as the Holy Spirit Alone through… Read more

  • Weeping? for?

    Today, I weep,then sleep,then weep againlike that lost sock from the laundry as I sit alone; the weight of the world sits deep within my emotions I reach for the remote yet the TV screen feels like a cruel joke, laughter without warmth,voices from other lives, all pretend I try to hold on,but the walls… Read more

  • Happy Valentines day 2026

    Year number 11 is here as I cradle a card,the embossed letters,faded, empty frames without your faces,smiling ghosts,haunting my thoughts Tied by barbed wire to a post, a single rose wilts, it’s secrets and memories I’ll never  share, for people now are too dense to truly grasp love and joy Today in my heart beneath… Read more

  • Certainty is this

    In the stillness before dawn my morning unfolds as I awaken wondering how many times can mercy rise insistent as the sun Then I remember a promise,carried on the breath of the wind, it’s the Holy Spirit speaking:“Great is Your faithfulness.” I think of the enemy,the creeping doubt,the voice that slithers through the chasms of… Read more

  • My son, I love you

    To Memory: Memory,you are a delicate thread, a tape-loop of laughter, hands molding clay,sticky ice cream fingers,the way he’d tilt his head,as if trying to catch the light and the sun that danced in his smiles I count the birthdays missed,balloons floating to ceilings,each one a year without his giggles, and there’s silence rather than… Read more

  • the axe and the heart

    my heart is growing teeth sharp and jagged, chewing and gnawing at what was once tender and now the bitterness of years gone by is no better than cold coffee the axe head came to my forest and I was oblivious because the handle was wooden, and I never paid attention to the whispers of… Read more

  • Daniel, Fasting and poor Franklin

    There are many churches today participating in the current fad known as The Daniel Fast. This is a man-made so-called spiritual activity that is supposed to automatically draw you closer to God by eating things that are on a list and not eating things that are not on a list. If you partake of this… Read more

  • I am the cup

    you’ve never been thereyou’ve never held each memoryI wear my scars like scratches, scuffs, and swirling spoons striking my body ,faded edges, chipped rim you don’t see the way I gather pieces of myself from the floor, as a reminderof the ones who slipped through my hands like tiny grains of sand loneliness is a… Read more

  • What’s wrong with me

    all I wanted was a family;  a tableset for Two to Four where laughter reigned as King, and smiles and hugs were found every dayinstead, silence was birthed: what’s wrong with me? I sift through photographs of my childhood looking at all the faces smiling, yet they are now long gone and only like ghosts… Read more

  • Auto/ life insurance

    Grace is God’s all-sufficient provision  secured at the cross and written in Blood and alive in His Word, the living Word, Jesus Christ. This contract bears out that as true Christian’s we none ever have to face a crisis wondering if God has made a way. Human nature definitely makes us ask, worry or get… Read more

  • webbed dust

    dust collects on the edges of memories living room walls grayed with outlines of what was,photographs hang in webbed silence each face frozen in a laugh that no longer resounds Their love as a vase cracked, yet still holding water,the stems of our shared days with petals dry, dead on the floor, they dropped only… Read more

  • Why, How, Reason?

    How do you write, why do you write; I was asked, and so with the weight of the room upon me and in a fragile breath I replied: Affective empathy,partial hyper empathy,I taste the salt of sorrow along with the sweet ache of absence,each word a single cord, becoming either a noose or a safety… Read more

  • it is very real

    Below are common C-PTSD markers, especially as they appear after long-term narcissistic or relational abuse. 1. Emotional DysregulationDifficulty returning to baseline after stress.Sudden anger, irritation, or rage (often followed by shame)Emotional numbness or shutdownFeeling “too much” or “nothing at all”Overwhelm from relatively small triggers 2. Persistent HypervigilanceThe nervous system stays in threat mode.Constant scanning for… Read more